Women and Gossip

Let’s face it: our culture isn’t filled with stories about how much men gossip. All the phrases or sayings in our language reflect the image of women as gossipers. The words are so easy to call up - cat, tattler, prattler. Obviously, none of the images attached to the notion of women as gossips are particularly flattering or admiring. Quite the opposite, in fact. These stereotypes, which are deeply rooted in our culture, are always pejorative or negative. “She’s a gossip” is an epithet that’s been hurled at women for time immemorial, and a misapprehension that continues on to this day.

A top level manager was recently over heard to say that it bothered him to see two females walking down a hallway and talking together, because he was so convinced they invariably were engaged in some form of gossip. (Of course, he didn’t have the slightest clue what they might be talking about.) And it’s no secret that in more rigidly patriarchal societies, those in authority, the men, have an even greater tendency to label much of the communication that occurs between women as mere “gossip.” This downplays and even denigrates the significance of what women say to one another, reinforcing the superiority of male communication (women talk about people and relationships while men talk about politics, work and sports). This, naturally, can encourage women themselves to downplay their interactions and communication.

Since my interests focus on the destructive side of gossip, the fact that women may spend more time than men talking about every day occurrences and relationships is not particularly significant. I have found no research evidence that shows women to be guiltier of malicious gossip then men. More importantly, there is no indication that I have found that indicates malicious gossip from a woman to be more destructive than malicious gossip from a man.